Archive for the ‘Love’ Category
Friday, August 12th, 2011
By Aly Walansky
It’s National Romance Month, and in recognition, Chemistry.com just released the nation’s Top 10 Cities to Find a Romantic Man.
“It’s a myth that men aren’t as romantic as women,” says Dr. Helen Fisher, Chief Scientific Advisor to Chemistry.com. “Your romantic streak just depends on your biological makeup. Based on my research at Chemistry.com, I have found that men who are more expressive of estrogen (and there are lots of them, including some football players), fall in love more regularly than others. These men are also the most creative when it comes to planning romantic activities, and romantic times are particularly meaningful to them.”
Chemistry.com’s data has revealed that the most romantic men in America can be found in cities known for their hip, laid-back culture, with San Francisco, CA , Portland, OR , and Austin, TX claiming the top three spots. The full findings can be found on Chemistry’s official blog, The Spark.
So move over, Paris… Here are the Top 10 Cities to Find a Romantic Man based on research from Chemistry.com:
- San Francisco, CA
- Portland, OR
- Austin, TX
- Salt Lake City, UT
- Hartford, CT
- Boston, MA
- Seattle, WA
- New York, NY
- Los Angeles, CA
- Washington D.C.
Is your city on this list? Do you agree with the results?
Wednesday, August 10th, 2011
By Aly Walansky
Nearly 10 years ago, the FDA approved the anti-depressant prescription drug Zoloft for the treatment of premenstrual syndrome (PMS) and one expert believes that’s 10 years too long, especially when natural alternatives have been proven to reduce PMS symptoms without drugs.
“It seems almost alien to me why someone would take a drug to relieve PMS when the drug’s list of potential side effects – drowsiness, nausea, headache, loss of appetite, anxiety, panic attacks, hostility, aggressiveness, restlessness and depression – are almost an identical match for the symptoms of the ailment they’re trying to relieve,” said Michael Mooney, Director of Research and Education at natural health company SuperNutrition Life Extension Research (www.supernutritionusa.com).
“There is a solid base of research that has shown that women can reduce PMS without taking a prescription drug. In fact, there are six simple, safe nutrients the body uses all the time that have been shown to reduce PMS discomfort – but they need to be taken in adequate potencies. These nutrients don’t have a list of side effects that sound worse than the PMS itself.”
Mooney cited six natural nutrients that have been shown to relieve PMS:
· Vitamin B6 (pyridoxine) – According to a study of 630 women published in the British Journal of Clinical Practice, 100 mg to 150 mg of supplemental vitamin B6 reduced PMS in about 66 percent of the women, while 160 mg to 200 mg of vitamin B6 reduced PMS in about 79 percent of the women.
· Vitamin D – The Archives of Internal Medicine published a study in 2005 which concluded that women with a higher median vitamin D intake of 706 IU per day had significantly less (or no) PMS than subjects who got a median of the least amount of vitamin D, 112 IU per day. So it’s not just about getting some vitamin D, but rather getting a potent dose.
· Chaste tree berry (Vitex) – This extract has been shown to reduce PMS, based on a randomized placebo-controlled 3-month study of premenstrual syndrome in 170 women (average age 36) which was published in the British Medical Journal. The results showed that 20 mg of chaste berry extract reduced PMS about 28% better than placebo. The women noted significant reductions in irritability, mood disturbances, anger, headache, and breast fullness compared to the placebo group.
· Calcium carbonate – The Journal of General Internal Medicine published the results of a study that concluded that calcium carbonate could reduce pain and water retention before and during a woman’s cycle. This randomized placebo-controlled study of 78 women showed a 58 percent better reduction in PMS with 1,000 mg of calcium carbonate than with placebo during the luteal and menstrual phases of the reproductive cycle.
· Magnesium – Two double-blind, placebo-controlled studies published in the Journal of Women’s Health showed that magnesium at 360 mg per day reduced headaches and pain, and at 200 mg reduced weight gain, fluid retention, swelling of extremities, breast tenderness and abdominal bloating.
· Vitamin E – The Journal of Reproductive Medicine published a study that showed vitamin E reduced 15 categories of PMS symptoms. This randomized, placebo-controlled study confirmed a previous study that showed all major categories of PMS symptoms are improved with a daily supplementation of 400 IU of vitamin E.” In all 15 categories of symptoms, vitamin E supplemented women reported 27-42 percent reduction in severity.
“The effects of these nutrients start the first month and generally reach maximum PMS reduction levels by month three,” Mooney added. “Women deserve to share the fruits of modern nutritional science and be informed that they can reduce their PMS discomfort without relying on drugs with all their dangerous side effects, but instead, by using nutrients that are natural to the body in the proven effective potencies.”
Wednesday, July 20th, 2011
By Aly Walansky
We all accept the sad fact that divorce is a life changing experience and good or bad, it can be a milestone in one’s life.
The new trend of throwing a “Divorce Party” isn’t meant to celebrate the demise of a relationship – it’s a celebration of the next chapter of one’s life- a “coming out” party into a new life of singlehood.
The Divorce Party trend has been made popular by celebrities like Jack White, Katie Price and most recently, Scarlett Johansson. Her divorce from Ryan Reynolds was made final on July 1, and soon after she was seen going out for celebratory drinks with friends at NYC hot spot XIX.
See: 6 Divorce success stories >>
In light of this recent “rumor” that Scarlett’s rep denies, we wondered, is it tacky or appropriate to be able to celebrate moving on from this difficult period in your
life? Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony recently announced they are getting a divorce, so we ask: Should one or both of them host a Divorce Party?
See: 5 Divorce myths to dismantle >>
A divorce party doesn’t have to be drinks at a club. In fact, as an example, residents of AVE residential and corporate suites in Somerset, NJ say they have had numerous residents come in as a result of a divorce, and Divorce Parties have become a major trend there. Whether it’s the community feel, or the mixers, it creates a draw for new singles looking to meet people and makes the transition from married to single a bit easier.
See: How to attract new love after a divorce >>
Whether hosting it at a place like AVE, with a celebratory barbecue and pool party, or on the rooftop of a chic hotel, martini in hand, a Divorce Party simply shows the world that you still have a wonderful life ahead of you and reminds you of all the people who are there to support you.
See: Eating your divorce cake >>
Would you consider a divorce party? How do you feel about the trend? Send us a message on Twitter – at @lovingyouonline or @alywalansky!
Monday, July 18th, 2011
By Aly Walansky
Despite popular belief, television and technology can actually be used to help, rather than harm, a relationship.
Here’s the deal: According to TiVo’s “Turn on the Love” survey* users spend more quality time together and are twice as likely as generic DVR users to put down their laptop during quality time at home.
“Plopping on the couch alone to watch sports for hours a day, sleeping next to your smart phone, or compulsively surfing the Internet can have a negative impact on a relationship, but there are smart ways that technology can actually help couples communicate more,” said renowned comedian and co-author of “He’s Just Not that into You,” Greg Behrendt. “Using TiVo’s access to music and movies increases a couple’s exposure to entertainment and pop culture which are light, but very real topics for a couple to bond over on a daily basis. In home entertainment certainly helps busy couples turn off daily stresses and create a romantic date night in.”
Among its findings, the survey revealed…
- Drama and sports come with more kisses. More than half of respondents will pause dramatic television shows for a smooch (54 percent), and a third of respondents will even pause their favorite team’s games for a kiss (33 percent).
- The definition of romance is broadening. While dining out still ranks first as the most romantic activity with a significant other, a night in to watch TV or a movie is a close second. And with more to watch/experience, users are more likely to classify a night in with their significant other as romantic, quality time
- Keep this recording. Despite the increase in romance thanks to television technology, a third of all survey respondents say they’ve “accidentally” deleted their partner’s recordings to make room for their own (31 percent).
Greg has the following tips for couples when it comes to using technology to help your relationship:
- Disconnect to reconnect with your partner. There is nothing wrong with checking your smart phone in your spare time, but when it butts into your dinner date or intimate moments it’s becoming a problem. Discuss your relationship phone policy so there are no miscommunications half way through the night.
- Timing is everything. In a good relationship, you know your partner is always thinking about ways to be considerate and score points in your relationship. If your honey is bummed because they will be missing their favorite show, have their program recorded and ready to watch when they get home. Just add popcorn, and you’ve changed their day from bad to good without paying a cent.
- Old can be as good (or even better!) than new. When planning a date night in, don’t just search the new releases for movies that your partner might like. Think about their favorite classic movie actor or even better, turn them on to something that had a big effect on you.
- Spontaneity and fluidity are key. In any relationship it’s important to remain spontaneous and change up daily plans at a moment’s notice.
- Sometimes a song says it best. Take out or a home cooked meal can take an evening from average to special.
Wednesday, July 13th, 2011
by: Yolanda Shoshana
New York City is a delectable city to tie the knot in. People are always asking me where a good location is for a wedding. After all, the last thing a bride wants to stress about is the perfect location. There are great luxury spots in the city that you could have your nuptials that maybe you haven’t thought of. Saying “I Do” in any of these venues will make you feel glamorous and chic.
Central Park- I have performed a few weddings at Central Park and it is quite an experience. If your wedding party is under 20 people this is the perfect spot for you to consider. It is quite affordable to get a permit to get married in the park. A cheap and beautiful place in the city is always a good thing, especially one that does not look or feel like. People will be walking by looking as your wedding takes place, you will feel like royalty.
New York City Zoo- It is getting popular to get married at the zoo. If this is your bag of tea, you can have a luxury at this location. Maybe you are an animal lover or you want something just a bit difference. It’s not everyday that people announce their wedding at the zoo. You can do the Central Park Zoo or the Bronx Zoo. Maybe you want to invite the seals or a baby monkey to be part of one of the best days of your life.
Botanical Gardens- This is one of my favorite places in New York City. It is absolutely beautiful and would be fabulous for your wedding backdrop. Check out the rose garden or even the lilies. There is an array of options for you to choose at the gardens. If you want an outdoor wedding, this is the go to place. It will be having a wedding in an enchanted forest.
New York Library- You could have a luxurious wedding in this space, did you know that? The architecture and the definition of the rooms are dramatically stunning. You would feel like a Princess as you saunter down the steps to the love of your life. The space has all the makings for a grand entrance.
City Hall- Don’t feel like spending a crazy amount on a wedding, keep it small and go to city hall. If it was good enough for Carrie in Sex and The City then it is good enough for you. Getting married on the down low then announcing it to all your friends is a slick move. Of course, you will have a grand soiree to celebrate afterwards. Keep the rice, flying doves, elephants on bicycles, etc. for another occasion, like your 50th anniversary.
Plaza Hotel- What girl wouldn’t want to get married at the Plaza Hotel? It is sexy, famous, and chic. If you have always dreamed of this day or you want to have a fairy tale wedding, the Plaza is definitely how you do it. All of your friends will want invites.
Yolanda Shsohana is a lifestyle provocateur: sex goddess, courtesan coach™, lifestyle guru, perfume creatrix, matchmaker, wedding officiant, and new thought speaker. She has a lifestyle show on Mingle Media TV called Courtesan Candy and a radio show Luscious Life on Women’s Radio. Follow her on Twitter @Shoshi
Sunday, July 10th, 2011
by: Yolanda Shoshana
Since I announced that I was opening up my interracial matchmaking services to the masses, I have had people eager to be set up and ready for love. While I would love to match everyone with the love of their life, I have to remind everyone that working with a matchmaker is a process.
Since matchmaking is not about magically producing a hot sexy partner in an instant (if only), there are a few things to keep in mind when working with a matchmaker.
1) Talk to a more than one matchmaker- Do yourself a favor and meet with a few matchmakers so that you know who will be the best one to work with. There are a lot of matchmakers out there so meet with as many as you need to until you feel comfortable. If your friends who have gone to a matchmaker ask them how the experience was, was the matchmaker available, etc.
2) Do not expect to be married in a month- When you sign up with a matchmaker, they may not have the perfect person waiting for you in the wings. Allow them time to conjure up people to set you up with. After all, the reason you are working with a matchmaker is to sort out the wrong people and bring you the right ones. I know I am always out shopping for people for my clients. A good matchmaker matches carefully and selectively. You can’t hurry love so exercise patience.
3) Expect to be interviewed- A matchmaker will interview you to get to know you better and to find out more about the person you are seeking. This is when you will find out how your matchmaker will arrange dates, how to follow up, and other important details that are needed for you to work together.
4) Be Open- Once you have selected your matchmaker and s/he wants to send you out with someone that may not be your normal type, take a chance, and go on the date, because it could be the one. There are plenty of people who end up with someone that they never imagined they would be with. Love has a way of striking when we least expect it.
5) Do Your Own Research- Even though your matchmaker will probably be doing a background check, feel free to do your own research on the people that you are set up. Google them, Bing them, look for them on Facebook, basically now there are a lot of ways to check out someone. Know that they will probably do a little research on you.
Yolanda Shoshana “Shoshi” is a lifestyle provocateur: sex goddess, courtesan coach™, spiritual guru, perfume creatrix, matchmaker, wedding officiant, and new thought speaker. She has a lifestyle show on Mingle Media TV called, Courtesan Candy. Follow her on Twitter @Shoshi
Wednesday, July 6th, 2011
By Aly Walansky
All eyes were on the photo circus as ringmaster Anthony Weiner released some rather cocky material during an avoidable sexting mistake…..
Debra Goldstein and Olivia Baniuszewicz’s Flirtexting: How to Text Your Way to His Heart could have saved him and probably hundreds of other politicians and celebrities before they got caught with their pants down. The book provides insight into the avoidable mishaps of sexting as they guide their readers into the next generation of love. Flirtexting—flirting via text, teaches readers how to create the BPT (best possible text), save themselves from sending the right text to the wrong person, master the steps to manipulate a text, know just when to reply, and much more.
Here’s some of my favorite tidbits:
§ Sexts should be used by mature adults in a committed relationship to avoid risky backlash
§ Stay classy by sending simple sexts telling him what you want to do when you see him later, or what you plan on wearing
§ Use the casual and safe environment of text to forgo shyness by sexting to reveal your fantasies
§ Spark fire in a long distance relationship with an exciting bedtime sext
§ Send a flirtext to spice up an existing relationship during work
§ Less is more, send sexy photos of new lingerie or a picture of your legs to get him aroused
§ Never include your face in a naked photo text
§ Avoid your kids seeing these photos by deleting them immediately from your phone after sending them
§ Don’t reveal everything in a text message exchange, leave him wanting more
§ Stay away from racy photos unless you’re in a serious relationship to avoid unwanted leaks and criticism
You Should Know:
§ Guys have said that they will often test girls by sending them a sext to see how they will respond.
§ Nothing is going to happen if you refuse to take it all off for a sext, except for maybe gaining more respect from the person asking you for it
- Sexts don’t have to be photo texts
§ Unlike phone sex, you don’t need to be anywhere private to send a sexy text
Friday, June 24th, 2011
(Guest post by Andrea N. Richesin, editor of Crush: 26 Real-life Tales of First Love )
Remember that scene in The Way We Were when Barbra Streisand stands almost defiantly at the top flight of stairs staring down at dreamy Robert Redford in his crisp white military suit?
Saying goodbye, he tips his hat to her and their eyes linger. Her eyes are saying, “Don’t leave” and his are pleading for her to say it out loud. These first loves tend to define who we are or who we want to become. When we make our way in the world, we look for validation and no one validates us more than a romantic partner.
In my new literary anthology Crush, many of the contributors fondly remember their own first loves with such longing. In Jacquelyn Mitchard’s moving portrait of her passionate yet short-lived relationship, she falls for the boy who becomes a soldier and dies tragically in Vietnam. Their story lives on in the letters she carefully hid in her fringed hippy purse and discovers again twenty years later in a thrift store window. Jackie confesses about the first time her blue-eyed Romeo kissed her, “It was evident I had never been born to want to do anything else and I would never for an hour, not for decades, think about anything else again without thinking about that first time.” She suspects if her children find her letters years from now, they will realize, “they comprise a holy relic of something they’ve never been able to imagine me being- a girl purely in love and in love purely, white-hot as snow.”
Lauren Oliver may best describe the euphoria of first love and its bittersweet nostalgia in her essay “Three Little Words.” When she rhapsodizes about her relationship with her first real boyfriend, she recalls, “I think of that curious admixture of intense pleasure and sharp pain, like the ache in your limbs and chest after you’ve just sprinted a very long way: a winding down, a happiness in being through, a joy in having pushed yourself to the end of something; and also some regret for all the distance you’ve covered so quickly, a distance you can never get back. Even when I was with Steve, it seems to me I was already nostalgic for our love and already mourning its end.”
First loves make lasting impressions on us that may often take a lifetime to get over. I discovered while editing Crush that they’re also a kind of gift because they make us stronger in the end.
Andrea N. Richesin is the editor of Crush: 26 Real-life Tales of First Love and three other literary anthologies. Check out the Crush book trailer and look for upcoming readings (in North Carolina, Tennessee, Oregon and Washington) on her website www.NickRichesin.com.
Thursday, June 23rd, 2011
By Aly Walansky
With 113 million people using online dating sites annually and 74% of singles looking for love online; online dating sites are becoming more and more prevalent as outlets for finding romantic connections.
While the Internet has expanded the dating pool, the results are all too often disappointing as daters end up looking nothing like their online persona would suggest.
Below are some tips on how to steer clear of online dating disasters and increase your chances of finding the perfect match faster.
- Honesty is the best policy: Resist the temptation to stretch the truth in your online description. If you tell the truth (which might be less than perfect) you’ll refrain from putting a damper on the date before it even begins.
- Set up an online date: Take advantage of video conferencing to arrange a virtual pre-date. If things start to go badly, it’s as easy as ending the video connection.
- Go with your gut: If at anytime something strikes you as off with the person you’re talking to, don’t be afraid to cut the connection. It’s not worth meeting someone who strikes you as being a bit “off”.
- Don’t be afraid to ask the hard-hitting questions: Ask any questions that are important to you in a significant other. Don’t be shy of asking about their smoking habits/political or religious beliefs; it saves you the disappointment if their views don’t jive with yours done the line.
- Err on the side of caution: Before meeting your “knight in digital armor,” refrain from giving out your personal email address or telephone number. Instead, sign up for an alternate phone number that you can just cancel if you need to cut contact. Consider a disposable two-way calling service which allows for texting and calling.