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Posts Tagged ‘lovemaking’

Sex Tips Gone Wild: Hot or Not?

Wednesday, February 16th, 2011

By Jennifer Latkiewicz

If it’s coming from sex bibles Cosmopolitan and The Joy of Sex it must be good, right? But 60 international editions and 8 million copies later, respectively, are we any closer to demystifying than we were forty years ago? Or do bad sex tips simply beget

Our panel of guys discuss these and other equally creative albeit slightly ridiculous advice

Would these new bedroom tricks blow his mind… or have him scratching his head?

Guys discuss the real-life application of these kinky, out-there and extremely dangerous sex tips. Do not try these at home?

weird sex tips

“tip”

“tip”

Everyone knows Cosmo is all about the sexy time. Every issue is packed with sexy sexual … So, it’s surprising that a lot of the expert sex tips and tricks they feature are impractical, nonsensical and sometimes, painfully awkward.

But even Cosmo can occasionally teeter between adventurous and confusing.

Do the editors really think their readers will try these techniques?

An odd combination of ,, and props, Cosmo sex tips are uniquely Cosmo. “I would probably think it was kind of weird and ask ‘You’ve been reading Cosmo again haven’t you?’”

most of us probably spent our formative years with a very different understanding of sex than the one we have years later.

Until they institute an objective rating system or make it an Olympic sport, sex will .

As pervasive as sex is, our society still lacks a structured way to teach us exactly how to do, um, it. Sure, we had Sex Ed but it did little to demystify this whole S-E-X thing. We may have learned about the tools in our toolbox but unfortunately, no one ever showed us how to actually use them.

And if you’ve ever been a 12-year-old girl, you know how mind-blowingly inaccurate the information about sex can be.

Depending on the resources available, perspectives will likely vary.

the glazed donut, the dddd —  are they just still wingin’ it?

And with everything from sleepover gossip and romance novels, to lad mags and “Shaving Private Ryan” bootlegs at the foundation of our sexual know-how, tips and advice will likely vary.

Coming from an 8th grader, the idea that oral sex is defined by timbral quality is one thing. But to see renowned “sex bibles” (written by adults who presumably have had sex for real) print it in their pages definitely had me questioning the credibility behind it and other ‘mind-blowing’ gospel. Donut-y fellatio, sex on a moving motorcycle and more — our panel of guys weigh in on sexdom’s most out-there ‘expert’ tips.

Before you, check out what our panel of guys has to say about a few of the ‘kinkiest’ and most out-there sex tips.


Donut Penis Ring

According to Cosmo: “Slip a glazed doughnut around his manhood and nibble it off.”

Food and sex — it worked in 9 1/2 Weeks, didn’t it? Jono insists, “No, not together!” “I would rather eat the (clean!) donut myself after we’re done,” says Andy, 31.

But if it’s not the mess that deters him, the general idea of high-calorie fellatio may. “I would be amused by her efforts but not find it to be hot at all.  It would sort of kill the mood,” Daniel admits. Agrees Nick, 31: “I would probably think it was kind of weird and ask ‘You’ve been reading Cosmo again haven’t you?’”

“‘A’ for effort though,” says Daniel.

Joyride
Giving safety and sensibility the big heave-ho, the original sex bible, The Joy of Sex, suggested couples get frisky on horseback and a moving motorcycle.
If you have access to a private road, the hazards are yours,”

Not only is weird, but illegal, too.

Spice It Up

“Sprinkle a little pepper under his nose right before he climaxes. Sneezing can feel similar to an orgasm and amplify the feel-good effects.”

Apparently it’s sneezegasm-inducing black pepper — not ‘variety’ — that’s the spice of life. ”‘Annoy him to such an extent that he fails to achieve a satisfying climax,’ is what this sounds like,” Jono says.

Joystick

Another suggestion was to move the penis around like “an old-school Atari joystick, up, down, side to side.”

While I find the handjob/Space Invaders connection to be somewhat horrifying, the guys say there may be something to this joystick joyride. “I like this move,” John says. “Circles are fun, too.”

If you’re not into video games, Max has another suggestion: “A little Shake Weight action would be good, too.”

Nick has a simpler perspective. “Anytime a woman is holding my penis I’m generally a happy man.”

Hair Scrunchies

“Start by stacking six scrunchies on top of each other over his package. Then remove them one by one using your lips and tongue.”

While the other guys immediately deemed this technique as simply “weird”, Jono sees potential. “I could see where this would be interesting foreplay.” No way, says Andy. “If you’re thinking of using this one, it’s time to wave the white flag and join the nunnery.”

Hypnosis


While the sex tips may not always be universally on point, Cosmo does offer men important insight. ”I found that I learned much about how women view relationships,” says Nick, who was at one time actually subscribed to the magazine. “The magazine is hilarious,” says Andy. “Embarrassing tampon debacles never get old.”

Save the donuts for breakfast. Check out the latest tips and tricks from LovingYou’s resident sexperts!

Jennifer Latkiewicz is a Love/Sex blogger for LovingYou.com and long-time Cosmo subscriber. She finds the mental image of a scrunchie-covered penis to be both hilarious and frightening. Follow her on Twitter at @jenniferlat.

your hands firmly protecting on your ‘manhood’ from an onslaught of hair bands and donuts?

Steamy Sex Tape? 3 Ways to Protect Your Privacy

Saturday, January 29th, 2011

By Jennifer Latkiewicz

Not everybody with a sex tape wants to make money or somehow further their career — here’s how to keep your intimate moment from going public.

paris hilton sex tapeWith news of a second sex tape starring former “Girls Next Door star and Playboy model Kendra Wilkinson making headlines this week, we’re reminded yet again of Murphy’s other law: If you’re a celebrity and you have a sex tape, it will come out.

Even if you’re not a celebrity, having a sex tape is still at risk for unwanted exposure. But with the voyeuristic thrill and heightened intimacy between you and your partner, unleashing your inner exhibitionist on film could be worth adding to your sexual bucket list.

Unless you could care less about other people seeing your ‘O’ face, or have plans to secretly leak it yourself, you may want to protect your privacy by taking a few extra precautions, just in case.

Of course, your safest bet is to watch the tape immediately then deleting it, but if you insist on keeping an original, download some free encryption software like TrueCrypt to create a hidden, password-protected folder where the video file can be stored securely on your hard drive — even if your computer is stolen or hijacked.

If you filmed it to a DVD, make sure only one copy exists and keep it under lock and key. For years, I seriously feared that one day, I’d drop dead and my grieving parents would discover the ghastly double-ended dildo I received as a gag gift and kept hidden in my closet. Prevent any potential awkwardness by labeling the video as ‘PRIVATE’ with instructions to destroy it immediately. Sure, it’s slightly ridiculous but at least your private affairs will remain private — even in the afterlife.

Find even more sex tips and info on orgasms and libido >>

Jennifer Latkiewicz is a Love/Sex blogger for LovingYou.com. Follow her on Twitter at @JenniferLat.

The Wow Factor Heats Up Your Sex Life

Tuesday, January 25th, 2011

by: Yolanda Shoshana

When you bring out the “wow” factor in a relationship it steps up your sex life. The wow factor is good whether you are in a new relationship and have been holding back your best moves or you are a little bored with your boo so you want to bring back the spark. Here are some sexy things you can do that will “wow” you man and blow his socks off (among other things)!

Suggest watching a porn movie.

The power of porn can be magic. You may be thinking, anything but porn, but there is quite a bit of porn being made from a women’s perspective so you do not have to get the typical no plot porn. The biggest growing audience for porn today is women; the chances of you finding a flick you like are good. Men get so excited if their lady watches porn with them. It makes him see you as a little naughty which really gets him going.

Sextext throughout the day.

If you haven’t sent him a suggestive text in a while, this is an easy way to fire him up. Throughout the day send him a text about what you are going to do to him later. Do not give to many details, because less is more. What a great way to have foreplay begin without being it the same room.  Casually be waiting in just a thong when he arrives home, it’s on!

Put scented underwear in his pocket.

Get a hot pair of underwear, maybe something new that he hasn’t seen before. Spray it with perfume and put it in his jacket or briefcase before he goes to work. When he finds the undies he will want you right then and now, but oh he will have to wait. This move will have him hard all day.

Read the diary of Anais Nin.

Have your man cuddle up right next to you, then use your sexiest voice to read diary entries from Anais Nin. He won’t know what him. Erotic words from Anais Nin can lead to more creativity in the boudoir, she knew what she was doing!

Give a Half Time Blow Job.

During a half time of any game when it’s just the two of you; go give him an unexpected blowjob. When half time is almost over, finish him off, then look at him with smile and walk away. The only thing left for him to say is “wow”.

Boost Your Sex Life With Lube

Friday, January 7th, 2011

By Jennifer Latkiewicz
Forget the naughty toys and yoga-like sexual positions. The one easy (and scientifically proven) way to make sex more satisfying? Lube!

When it comes to safe, satisfying sex, wetter is better, say researchers at Indiana University. In a recent study of 2,453 women, participants reported “significantly higher” sexual pleasure and sexual satisfaction when a lubricant was used compared to sex without one.

Even if you don’t think you need it for dryness, you may be pleasantly surprised at what a good personal lubricant can do for your sex life. For added intensity, try a warming lube or freezable lube like Touché Ice. Using a condom? Put a small dollop of lube inside the tip to boost the sensations he feels inside the latex.

Lubricants can be made from water, silicone or oil, though water-based lube is most popular. Unlike oil-based lubes which can corrode latex, water-soluble formulas can be used safely with condoms and are easiest to clean up. If you’re prone to yeast infections, opt for a water-based lube that are glycerin-free.

Try a dime-sized drop at first — you can always add more later. A little wetness will ease penetration and prolong lovemaking sessions, but too much can make generating any friction nearly impossible. Wetter is better but when it comes applying the lube, less is definitely more.

Have you seen a boost in your sex life since using lubes? Share your stories in the comments section!

Jennifer Latkiewicz is a Love/Sex blogger for LovingYou.com. Follow her on Twitter at @jenniferlat.

Sex Snafus: Overcoming The Queef

Monday, November 22nd, 2010

by Stephanie G.

Don’t let a little inopportune friction destroy sexy-time.

Perhaps highest on the list of things I don’t want to happen during intercourse is the queef, or in crass vagina slang, “the vagina fart.” No matter how many times you’ve experienced the queef, I think it’s safe to say that even a bona fied queef veteran isn’t any less shocked and embarrassed by that unfortunate, retched sound.

If you’re sleeping with a solid dude, he may pretend to be hard of hearing to put you at ease when a queef strikes. “What noise? I didn’t hear anything.” We all know that isn’t true. Along with the sound of a dying giraffe or an incessant car alarm, that sound is impossible to dismiss; no matter how fixated on sex your guy may be. Not to mention, queefs sound strikingly similar to the passing of gas, which men are more than familiar with. So what to do?

Understand the queef: Queefing occurs when air makes its way into your vagina. Under normal circumstance, your vagina does not have air in it. A penis is able to slip in and out without much pomp and circumstance. But when air becomes trapped (usually during the changing of positions), and a penis pushes its way in, it pushes the air out in effect– this is what causes that seagull mating call to escape from your vagina (I think this is how trombones work, too).

Take it slow: Don’t get all hot and heavy immediately. Ease into sex. Be especially careful when changing positions, as this is prime queef time. If you maneuver into the next position without the penis making an exit, this almost guarantees a smooth transition.

Know the risks: Some positions make queefs damn near unavoidable. Any position where your legs and hips are up in the air is dangerous. Doggy-style is another position to avoid if you aren’t willing to expel a little excess air in front of your mate.

If all else fails, if the cat is let out of the bag, there’s only one thing to do: laugh. Like I said, most men play dumb and ignore it all together. You have to expect that most men, especially at their most inexperienced, have caused their fair share of queefs. Any man intimidated or grossed out by a queef is one that needs to circle the block a couple more times before sleeping with an awesome woman who understands her body (read: YOU).

Stephanie is a NYC lifer who enjoys new-age dating, sharp-dressed men, and occasionally acting as big spoon. Follow her on Twitter!

Enhance Your Orgasms With Kegels

Monday, November 22nd, 2010

by Stephanie G.

Kegel exercises are the key to longer, stronger orgasms.

There comes a time in life when every woman must take control over her vagina– whether she’s toning it down via monogamy, or toning it up via pelvic floor exercises. While the former takes mental strength; the latter is all about pushing yourself physically– kegels help to strengthen the PC muscles and your orgasms.

Step One: Find your PC muscle

Some people begin kegels, unknowingly exercising the wrong muscles. The next time you urinate, stop the stream prematurely. You’ve just used your PC muscle! This motion is one that’ll help restore your vagina’s glory, so familiarize yourself with it before getting started. Be sure to isolate your PC muscle; you want to avoid working your abdomen, butt, and thighs. This right here, is about the vagina.

Step Two: The Slow Kegel

Squeeze your PC muscles as hard as you can, then hold them tight. Count for 3-5 seconds before releasing the muscle. Give the muscles a 5 second rest, then get back to it. You can do a kegel anywhere– on line at the grocery store, in the shower, on the couch while you’re watching TV. Calculate how many kegels you can do before your muscles get tired, this will be your baseline.

Step Three: Step It Up With Repitions

Like any effective exercise plan, kegels work best when you do them in sets, or “reps,” as the gym rats call it. Using your baseline, figure out how many reps of squeeze/hold/release you can do comfortably. Try to start doing at least 5 reps per set to begin.

Step Four: Build Your Strength

You’ll want to begin holding your kegels longer. Doing 5 seconds? Try 10. Doing 5 repetitions per set? Double up. Don’t limit your pelvis. You’ll also want to begin adding some variety to your routine. Change up your sets, doing two quick reps and one slow rep to keep it interesting. Make sure that you’re not over-doing it. You should have built your way up to this set. Cramping or other discomfort is a sign that you need to stand down and take a break.

Step Five: Bring It To The Bedroom

Once your muscles are strong, you’ll want to practice your kegels in real life scenarios, like masturbation and sex. Once you’re an old pro, line up your climax with your kegel exercises to experience an orgasm well deserved.

Stephanie is a NYC lifer who enjoys new-age dating, sharp-dressed men, and occasionally acting as big spoon. Follow her on Twitter!

How To: Bring Food Into The Bedroom

Monday, November 22nd, 2010

by Stephanie G.

You know what foods turn you on– but how do you take them from the kitchen to the bedroom?

We’ve all had questions about food in the bedroom ever since George Costanza’s pastrami on rye incident. Here are some simple steps to indulge in your food-based fantasies.

Talk to your partner first: You should come to an agreement on what foods are off-limits. Your partner may not share your preferences, and you don’t want to sour what could be a delectable experience for both of you.

Be prepared: Don’t decide at the last minute that you need to hop out of bed to scrounge up some edibles. Have your chosen dishes on standby for when the mood strikes. Make sure to use old bed sheets and towels in case things get sticky, and ensure that you’ll both be able to shower afterward. Most aphrodisiacs tend to leave a mess behind, and nothing kills the mood like playing maid after a romp.

Have some fun with your treats: The point of bringing food to the bedroom is not to lay out and have a meal with your partner in hopes that’ll turn the two of you on. That’s what a kitchen table is for. Use your treats to tease and tickle each other.

Avoid holes (except for your mouth): Sugars and dyes in food can cause irritation if they get into a sensitive area. If you’d like to add some flavor to your partner’s genitals, use a flavored lube Iike JO Flavored Lubricants (they have a ton of flavors to choose from, like Raspberry or Peachy Lips; and their latex-safe, no-stick lubes don’t use artificial sweeteners).

Stephanie is a NYC lifer who enjoys new-age dating, sharp-dressed men, and occasionally acting as big spoon. Follow her on Twitter!

Discover Your Sexual Persona

Monday, November 22nd, 2010

by Stephanie G.

There are four common sexual personalities– how can you use yours to your advantage?

Intensity. Persistence. Sensitivity. Adaptability. (Sounds like the psychological evaluation of a pro-football team, doesn’t it?) Most people exhibit one of these traits more profoundly than the rest, and that trait affects how life plays out in the boardroom and the bedroom. Which trait has the most influence over you, and how can you make the most of it?

Intensity

What it means: You have a flair for the dramatic. Everything you experience is big and bold, especially your emotions.

How to work it: You know how “the crazy ones” are always good in bed? That old adage may be referring to you, my friend. Because your emotions are larger than life, so are your orgasms. You tend to experience arousal intensely, which is fun for both you and your partner. Keep the cray coming!

Persistence

What it means: You’re what people refer to as a workhorse. You lock into something, and you stay focused until your task is completed. You have strong follow-through skills and never get sidetracked, no matter how undesirable the task at hand may be.

How to work it: When you put down the BlackBerry and make the decision to commit to a romp session, you’re in for the win. Noises, to-do lists, and other distractions are no match for your current goal: achieving orgasm.

Sensitivity

What it means: You’re way in tune with your senses; sometimes to a fault. On top of heightened emotional sensitivity, you’re also probably much more aware of scents, sounds, textures, and tastes. Of all of the traits, you’re the one whose most likely to smell your neighbor’s cooking through several walls, remember your dead grandmother who used to cook that same exact dish (or something that smells like), and then cry about it because you miss your grandmother (even though you’d only met her twice).

How to work it: You’re highly aware of what goes on around you, so you’ll be in synch with your partner. His sexy scent, his stare, and his touch are likely to have an added effect to your arousal.

Adaptability

What it means: You don’t have many hang ups, and you like to roll with the punches. New things don’t scare you.

How to work it: New people don’t scare you, either. Nor do new positions. You’re much more likely to adapt between the sheets with ease, and you’re able to manipulate any situation to your enjoyment.

Stephanie is a NYC lifer who enjoys new-age dating, sharp-dressed men, and occasionally acting as big spoon. Follow her on Twitter!

Getting Him To Focus on Foreplay

Tuesday, November 16th, 2010

By Jennifer Latkiewicz

Does your guy think all you need is a little groping and a few dirty words before sex? Here’s a foolproof way to get him to take a step back and focus on foreplay every time.

“More foreplay!” may be long-held female mantra but as it turns out, there’s plenty in it for dudes, too.

The fact is, sex is different for men and women. Women generally need foreplay, as it’s more difficult to become aroused, and eventually orgasm, through intercourse alone. In contrast, men can go from 0 to 60, and as a result, may sometimes view foreplay as simply an inconvenient truth — a necessary albeit less-than-exciting means to a totally awesome end.

But according to Eric. R. Braverman, M.D., for men, foreplay is more than a gentleman “courtesy”, a display of bedroom prowess, or a way to secure sexual brownie points with a lady friend. It can actually enhance the experience for him, too!

“When men engage in foreplay they have less anxiety about the upcoming sexual act,” says Dr. Eric R. Braverman, director of New York’s PATH Medical Center and author of the forthcoming book Younger (Sexier) You: Have the Best Sex of Your Life and Get Healthier. “Foreplay helps establish intimacy and understanding: it’s essential for good, strong erections. Many men find that prolonged foreplay enhances their orgasm, especially as they get older.” It can also lead to better sessions in the sack that last twice as long!

Less anxiety, stronger erections, better orgasms, longer sessions? Don’t be surprised if he starts insisting on foreplay from now on.

In the meantime, Dr. Braverman offers these tips for enhancing your foreplay technique:

Get back to kissing.
Kissing is an essential part of foreplay, as it triggers a cascade of brain signals and chemicals unleash sensations of sexual excitement and intense emotions.

Start with a hug.
A long, 20-30 second hug has been shown to increase a women’s oxytocin level, the hormone that heightens sexual arousal.

Talk about what you want.
Set aside a few minutes of uninterrupted time to sit down beforehand and discuss your sexual fantasies. Don’t touch, just talk.

Take a shower together.
How could a steamy shower not move things in the right direction?

Then, put your clothes back on.
Indulge in some fully clothed foreplay, teasing each other’s bodies through the fabric — skin-on-skin contact will be that much more incendiary.

Change your location.
Think outside the bedroom box. Be discreet and take your party elsewhere.

Learn the art of erotic touch.
Massage your partner with warm oil and experiment to learn where he or shoe likes to be touched.

Create the mood.
Aromatherapy, music, soft lighting, candles and sexy lingerie really do alter your brain chemistry by triggering your senses. (Check out Flames of Desire: The 5 Sexiest Candles For Setting the Mood)

Try Allura or Zestra.
These non-prescription topical treatments are applied to the clitoris and labia to increase both the speed of nerve conduction and the blood flow, improving sexual arousal.

Dr. Braverman’s Younger (Sexier) You: Have the Best Sex of Your Life and Get Healthier will hit bookstores nationwide on December 21, 2010.

Jennifer Latkiewicz is a Love/Sex blogger for LovingYou.com. Follow her on Twitter at @jenniferlat.

9 Ways Sex Improves Your Health

Tuesday, November 16th, 2010

By Jennifer Latkiewicz

Does sex once a day really keep the doctor away? According to Dr. Eric R. Braverman, getting it on has some serious health benefits, too.

We all know some quality nooky can put an extra bounce in our step, but according to Eric R. Braverman, M.D., it’s even better than you thought — great sex actually enhances our health, too.

“Sex is like an electrical charge,” explains Dr. Braverman, director of New York’s PATH Medical Center and author of the New York Times bestseller Younger (Thinner) You Diet. “And an orgasm is like rebooting your entire computer, powering up your health in multiple ways.”

In his new book Younger (Sexier) You: Have the Best Sex of Your Life and Get Healthier, Dr. Braverman reveals the countless benefits of an active sex life that go beyond just recreation and procreation. From improving cognitive function to boosting the immune system, here are 8 ways, he says, great sex can contribute to great health:

1. Sex Makes You Thinner

Of course, you’re not going to drop 10 pounds every time you have sex, but according to Dr. Braverman, studies have shown sexual activity raises your metabolism and can burn up to 200 calories a session. Additionally, Oxytocin (the “love hormone” released during orgasm) is known to cut appetite, while a healthy sex drive facilities your skin’s ability to produce Vitamin D, which strengthens your bones and muscles.

2. Sex Helps Keep Your Memory Sharp

Forget about St. John’s Wort and crossword puzzles. If you want to keep brain powered up well into your golden years, start getting busy — and regularly, advises Dr. Braverman. From the age of about 30 on, your brain speed begins to slow down, but an active sex life will help keep your thinking speed quick, due to oxytocin, which regulates normal cognitive behaviors and helps aid memory.

younger sexier you book3. Sex Helps Keep You Emotionally Stable

No more drowning your sorrows in booze, pills and chocolate chip ice cream. Oxytocin lowers levels of cortisol, the hormone released during stress, helping to reduce anxiety and even lessening cravings for food, alcohol and drugs. Orgasm can have an antidepressant effect, too, thanks to a hormone found in semen (prostaglandin) that when absorbed by women, has shown to reduce depression in women.

4. Sex Makes You Rested and Content

That sleepy feeling post-sex? It’s not a myth or cliche — an orgasm really does help you get to sleep, which is especially important considering lack of quality shut-eye is not only an age accelerator, but a sign that your brain is imbalanced, says Dr. Braverman.

5. Sex Reduces Risk of Heart Attack and Disease

Having sex two or more times a week has shown to have a protective effect on heart health, says Dr. Braverman, who also cites a 2001 study that suggests thrice-weekly romp sessions can also reduce the risk of heart attack or stroke in males by half.

6. Sex Improves Your Immunity

“Orgasms are thought to fight infection, increasing the number of infection-fighting cells up to 20 percent,” says Dr. Braverman. But sex doesn’t just mean fewer sick days — some scientists believe it has cancer-fighting properties as well, thanks to oxytocin, which also serves as a natural antibiotic.

7. Sex Provides Pain Relief

Don’t just pop an Advil — according to Dr. Braverman, sex can help relieve both menstrual cramps and migraine headaches.

8. Sex Can Help Regulate Your Monthly Cycle

Sure, there are phone apps and websites that help track your monthly period but those high-tech methods are decidedly less fun —  women who have sex at least once a week are likely to have more regular menstrual cycles due to the higher levels of estrogen, Dr. Braverman says, citing a study by Planned Parenthood.

9. Sex Makes You Look 10 Years Younger

It’s not just about feeling younger, but looking younger, too! While genetics account for 25 percent of one’s youthful looks, behavior is responsible for the rest, which makes sex is the ultimate anti-ager. According to Dr. Braverman, a study conducted by a neuropsychologist found that couples who have sex three or more times a week look more than a decade younger than those who don’t. Can you say the same thing about your pricey skin cream?

Sex. It does a body good.

Dr. Braverman’s new book Younger (Sexier) You: Have the Best Sex of Your Life and Get Healthier hits bookshelves December 21, 2010.

Jennifer Latkiewicz is a Love/Sex blogger for LovingYou.com. Follow her on Twitter at @jenniferlat.

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